Mixing two in one this year. I usually share with you guys my end of year review and another one for my birthday however this time, it felt more logic to combine these.
2021 was a continuity of a challenging 2020. Starting it with the horror of losing my mother, an ache that I wish no one feels.The feeling of being an orphelin, doesn’t have an age limit. I was left without a father and a mother, and trust me, no one can fill their place. I am grateful to have the most lovable siblings and the most caring extended family; yet nothing is like the unconditional love that a parent gives. May we meet in Janna inshAllah.
The grief on my mother was soothed by my involvement in Medhomecare; helping families take care of their patients at home without having to go to the hospital, finding their medication and the right nurse to take care of the cases and of course giving them the emotional support that they need. Being part of this gave me alot of satisfaction. At one point, I felt that my role is over, and I moved on.
March was the birthday month needless To say that I was not extremely thrilled to celebrate yet I tried to make the best out of it.
April we had our family reunion after my mother passed away it was tough and hard to go through her things still it was needed for us to face her death and to realize that she’s not there anymore.
Ramadan is always a month that soothes my heart and soul and after which I was really getting a clearer idea of how I want my life to carry-on after going through these hardships.
We were and still are going through very challenging situations in Lebanon where at certain point our focus has shifted to the most basic things in our lives which are not at our reach anymore the silliest things like fuel electricity food so I tried to isolate myself from the constant nagging that I was surrounded with and was part of; in the end we are human beings and it was a normal way to react to what we are going through.
I spent most summer in my hometown to be able to concentrate on the coming. Without having a lot of outside noise and it’s there where I took the decision to actually leave my job and I eventually resigned during August. I was also taking care of the house the garden and connecting with nature again was purifying.
It took forever to finalize the resignation papers and it was time for me to take a break from my dear Lebanon and Travel to visit my brother and his family.
Your girl was active following her dreams, and I enrolled in ESMOD fashion styling class, three months later and I’m very proud to be certified as a stylist and it was one of the best decision that I’ve made last year where the all the effort was worth it.
Being away from home, comes with a price, sacrificing my personal space and independence yet sweet change having my family around, this is a pure blessing.
It was time for me to be back to Lebanon so I put myself into the mentality that I’m about to face again the daily struggles of electricity, fuel prices raising, dollar rates and more.
At certain point, it is all about the expectations and how we choose to adapt to conditions that are out of our hands.
Currently my goal is to grow my career in fashion, as a stylist, as an editor and content creator. I am shifting the attention inwards again working on my mental and physical health, working on decluttering my space whether from physical obstacles but also from obstacles that come in the form of humans which do not have a place anymore in my life.
At certain points of the journey you realize that your role is done and it’s time for you to move forward and this is the beauty of being connected with oneself and being connected with Allah Swt because you kind of let things go and you go with the flow to let things unfold the way they are meant to be.
Here I am right now, one year later, more mature or wiser I don’t know?! but let’s say that I am proud of who I am and proud of where I am right now, proud of my reactions and of my decisions and most of all I’m very grateful to Allah, to my family and friends and to those random people that we meet throughout the journey who teach us something and allow us to evolve in our life and I cannot wait to see what this year is holding for me.
Chapter 37 is opening and let’s hope and pray that it will be free from heart aches and full of joy regardless what are the conditions. I’m so thrilled and honored to have you on board with me this is our sixth year in a row and keep your eyes on the blog and my pages promising you as always the best!
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